If you’re out there and you’re learning Daygame as well, then reach out to me! I would love to have more friends that Daygame.
If you’re out there and you’re learning Daygame as well, then reach out to me! I would love to have more friends that Daygame.
Where do I even begin? I can’t believe this actually happened to me!
I was downtown with my friends in a convenience store grabbing some beers for a party around the corner when I saw a group of cute girls outside. My friends went outside to talk to them and I joined shortly after. The girl I was talking to was an innocent-looking Croatian/American and when she mentioned she liked listening to gangster rap music, I was fascinated. We spoke for maybe 20 minutes and she was very friendly. I remember spiking the conversation a few times but each time she gave me this weird look so I really thought she was just talking to me in friend mode. I got her number, and I went about my night not thinking much of it.
She was very distant over text but that all changed when I said “I want to take you out for some coffee.”
On our first date I couldn’t help but notice how dolled up she was. I complimented her on how good she looked and she loved that. We went about enjoying our green tea lattes. I had my logistics sorted so bouncing to venue 2 (a jazz bar) was extremely smooth and natural. When we arrived at the bar we got some gin and tonics and found a good booth seat. We must have been there for an hour. The difference between this date and all of my others was that it was mostly non-sexual except for a few key moments. I remember there being a moment after playing strawberry fields when I just kept on holding her hand. The vibe was too electric not to kiss her so I went for it and it worked out. I invited her to my place but she had to take care of some things at home so she couldn’t that night.
I was happy with the date. We tried to set something up the following week but she was sick so she ended up flaking. I was kind of discouraged after that but she did ask to reschedule so I took that as a good sign.
The next week we were texting back and forth and we ended up setting up a dinner date at my place. I was in high spirits all week looking forward to the date until the day before she told me she didn’t want to cook at my place and would actually feel more comfortable meeting in a public place. That hit me like a ton of bricks.
Combined with having a shit day I wasn’t really feeling up for scouting a venue for our date so I decided on the restaurant right around the corner from my house.
When it finally was time for our second date I was feeling much better. She was late, but to be fair, she was coming all the way to my neighborhood. When she finally showed up we talked as we walked to the restaurant. We had Korean BBQ and she was in the mood to drink so we had some shots and beer. I don’t remember being sexual at all, but I already kissed her and invited her home on our previous date so I was taking it easy.
Towards the end of the date we both weren’t enjoying the alcohol at the restaurant so I mentioned I had some tastier stuff at my place (conveniently around the corner) so we bounced. Back at mine, she was all over the place. She danced to my music, played with the wacky lamp on my nightstand and just explored my place in general. I got her to sit still by showing her some pictures from my travels and that’s when I pulled the trigger. I started kissing her which turned into us making out and rolling around passionately. I pulled her pants down and she was a little bit bashful because she hadn’t “prepared” down there but I reassured her that I didn’t care and then – the magic happened!
The smile on her face was so gorgeous as we were going at it and she even spent the night. 🙂
It is literally the morning after right now. My place is still a mess and I’m sitting here with a stupidly wide grin on my face, in shock that all this happened. Thank god for Daygame!
This chapter of my Daygame journey begins with a date. This girl flaked on me once before, but I finally got her to come out using the gift technique – trading $1 gifts on our date. We enjoyed some comfort building chit-chat over brownies and ice cream until I found out she didn’t have that much time to spend with me. Luckily, I planned my logistics in advance so we quickly bounced to venue 2. There we were in a dark bar sitting on the same side of the table enjoying beer and chips. When I noticed she was into the conversation enough to ignore her flashing phone on the table I went for the kiss. She coyly turned away and said “not yet.” I jokingly called her shy and went for another kiss in a few minutes. Things were ruined after that. As soon as I finished my last drop of beer she wanted to leave. I walked her to the subway station and I never saw her again.
I felt unreasonably cocky after that experience. I had now officially been on 2 dates from Daygame so apparently that made me an expert on women. I spotted a western girl in the candy shop downtown and I approached her like this.
As soon as she realized I was flirting with her (or at least trying to), she stopped responding to my texts. The next day I went out Daygaming and got 7 blowouts in a row and on the 8th approach she straight up told me she was not interested in meeting “foreigners.” I needed a change. My Korean wingman suggested I give Seoul a try. There would certainly be more English speaking women there. And so I did.
For the next month I would wake up at 5am on Saturdays, take a 4-hour train from Daegu to Seoul, pick up girls all day, sleep in the cheapest hostel I could find, pick up girls all day again and catch a 4-hour train back home Sunday night. These were truly tough times. It was below freezing temperature on Christmas Eve when I arrived in Seoul, the first time, all alone. I tried a little Nightgame but I was too scared to approach and the one girl I did open blew me off immediately. When I got back to my guest room (jail cell) I broke down and cried. Why did Daygame have to be so hard? Why did women have to be so mean to me?!
That’s not to say all of my time in Seoul was a complete waste. I remember it was around 150 approaches when I finally executed the model correctly. Watching the interaction unfold in front of me was like watching a masterpiece being painted.
I was getting more numbers than ever but still a lot of them were flaking on me. After a few weeks of these jaunts, I came back to Daegu broke and depressed. If you asked me why I was still continuing with this Daygame journey I would struggle to give you a solid answer. Any sane man would have given up by now.
I remember one day being on the brink of tears over all of the pain I was experiencing but I still hopped on the bus and went downtown to do some Daygame just to hit 170 approaches. To my surprise I met the hottest Korean girl I’ve seen on my adventures and I ended up taking her out on a date!
For this date I was determined not to mess things up like the last girl I dated so I did everything exactly the opposite way. We went out to a nice warm cafe, enjoyed some tea and I didn’t try to escalate with her, I just focused on building comfort. We were there for 3 hours. I told this girl everything about myself, my childhood dreams, embarrassing things I did in college, everything. I baited her to chime in every now and then but she seemed more than happy to listen to my stories. At the end of the date I walked her to the subway and she even texted me “thank you for the wonderful night ;).” I never saw that girl again. I was fed up. I booked a 2 week trip to Thailand and didn’t look back.
I had truly given up on Daygame at this point. That is, until my friend Danny brokered a bet between me and my other friend Chris. The terms of the bet are: If Chris gets laid first I have to pay him $100. If I get laid first he has to pay me $100. If none of us got laid we both have to pay Danny $50 each. The deadline is June 1st, 2017.
During a particularly memorable night out in Seoul with my friends, Danny really layed into me about my Daygame obsession. “You shouldn’t have been in Seoul by yourself for Christmas, you should have been with your fucking mates!!” he yelled in a drunken rage. “Women are like dogs, they can smell desperation and you are coming across as Mr. I-Need-Pussy!” He was right, but how am I supposed to come across as not caring when it’s my job to initiate things with a woman? At any rate, I was a bit weary of panhandling for pussy in the streets so much.
I was a bit confused after that episode. I wasn’t sure if I should give up or if I should keep going. I loved Daygame but it was clear that it didn’t love me back. Daygame had become like a weird drug addiction only except I wasn’t getting high (i.e. laid). I decided to give it one more go before taking another long break. I hit the streets on Valentine’s Day and successfully opened my first 2-set. They were Russian and they enjoyed talking to me. The one I was hitting on invited me to get pizza with them. It wasn’t technically an I-Date since there were 2 of them but it was a welcomed interruption from my Daygame session. I had lunch with them and I got the contact details of the one I was interested in. I went on yet another vacation – this time to Japan. When I got back, I took the Russian out on a date.
I met her downtown at 8pm and we went to a trendy coffee shop to have some green tea lattes. It was just basic chit-chat except this time there were a few spikes here and there. We went to a cool Jazz bar for venue 2 and I checked her out on the way which made her giggle. As I was about to begin deep rapport in venue 2 a super loud band began playing. It was too loud to have a decent conversation but we did whisper jokes back and forth to each other about the band. I was having fun on the date, this was the best one yet. When the band finished I tried to carry on with rapport but her friend was in trouble at a near by bar. We went and checked on the friend, all was well, and we resumed our date on some nearby couches. I told her she smiled too much and held her hands for 10 seconds to see if she could be serious for a second. The vibe was electric after that but I was too afraid go for the kiss and I HATE myself for that.
After that it was time to go as she needed to catch the bus back home. I walked her to the station, she gave me a hug and invited me to her campus tomorrow to meet some of her friends. She boarded the bus and vanished into the night. I walked home beating myself up for not taking action at the right moment.
I hung out with her and her friends for about 4 hours in her apartment the next day. I’m sure this was a terrible idea (seduction wise) but I was happy that a girl finally wanted to see me again after a first date so I went with it. As that long day finally came to an end, I found myself alone with her at the bus stop waiting for my bus. It would have been bizarre to just kiss her out of nowhere at this point, but I had to do something as I was surely waist deep in the friendzone by now. I bluntly told her that I liked her, I did some BS palm reading and put her hands on my shoulders and asked (cringe) if she would get mad if I kissed her right now. She quickly put her hands back in her pockets and said it would be too soon, “there’s no rush.” I told her that I wanted to take her out on a “proper date” just to get my intentions across right before I boarded the bus. I rode home in a spiral of anxiety.
The last 10 approaches were a field day. It was a holiday in South Korea and I went downtown determined to hit 200. I was running around approaching girls in high spirits because I could see myself running though the model much better now. Out of those 10 approaches, I got 4 numbers! Go me! Even though they have all flaked or let me down gently with a long and thought out text message it was still an exhilarating experience.
So where does that leave me now? I have done 200 approaches in total, and out of this set of 100 I’ve gotten 20 phone numbers, 3 dates and 0 lays. Even though I am technically doing a lot better than my first 100 approaches it doesn’t feel like it. I feel like I have crossed a stormy ocean and washed up on a warm sandy beach thinking I have made it to the promise land only to look up and see a mountain that I must now climb. That mountain being sexual escalation.
My challenge moving forward is – having the courage to escalate and having the calibration to do it smoothly. That and keeping my Daygame shenanigans away from my friends who are genuinely concerned for my mental health along this journey. For my next 100 approaches I think I will try Gutter game/Bar game because I assume that will give me more opportunities to escalate. I don’t know what’s going to happen moving forward, I don’t even know if I’m on the right track but one thing is for certain, I have to keep going if I want to become a successful PUA.
Before I get started this is not another London-based PUA blog. Far from it. I am a 23-year-old American ex-pat living in Daegu, South Korea and I have taken it upon myself to begin the quest of learning Daygame after a particularly rocky summer with my now ex-girlfriend.
I have a bit of pre-daygame experience. At the beginning of the summer I took a trip to Seoul to try to pick up some girls. My first approach almost led to a 1-night-stand. It was exciting but it was blind luck. It was an extremely nerve-racking weekend but I did learn that I gravitate towards quieter environments instead of loud bars and clubs. Coincidentally, that summer I came across a few daygame blogs (TomTorero.com, KrauserPUA.com, and TDdaygame.com) that really resonated with me. I was very inspired by their transformations and decided that if they could claw their way up into this daygame lifestyle, then I could to!
By the end of summer I managed to date my first Korean girl (who ended up friend-zoning me) and a cute German girl (which ended in a kiss). I decided I was fully ready to commit to the daygame journey after muddling around with it for a summer.
I officially started my adventure in October of 2016. I hit the streets of downtown Daegu with a vengeance. It took me 6 hours and 8 approaches but I got my first phone number from daygame and I couldn’t be happier. I felt like I was walking on a cloud. It was truly a euphoric moment. But I soon learned about the dramatic ups and downs of daygame. I crashed when I realized that she was never going to come out on a date with me.
It was around 50 approaches when I finally got the number of a cute Korean girl who agreed to go out on a date with me. Initially I wasn’t even going to text her because I didn’t think she was interested in me and I was a bit shell-shocked from all of the rejection I was experiencing. I didn’t plan logistics for the date because I didn’t think she would actually show up, but she did, and I screwed up Tom Torero’s Dating Model (just like I did with the first Korean girl I dated).
Things were tough after that experience because I knew it would be a while until I found another girl who spoke English, would give me her phone number and would come out on a date with me. There is literally a graveyard of text conversations in my phone that have went dead.
I picked myself up out of the resulting slump that I was in and hit the streets again. I managed to number close a girl and the following day I number closed another girl in the same exact location. It felt good. Strange things happen when you spend so much time in the city center picking up girls. I met a Korean guy and we befriended each other immediately and walked around downtown, daygaming together. He was my personal translator. It was educational and hilarious at the same time! We were a real life Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan duo roaming the streets.
The following day I capitalized on the momentum of that unusual experience and I managed to number close 2 girls back to back. I had a huge triumphant grin on my face after that! I congratulated myself because Daygaming alone in a foreign country is HARD and I reached 100 approaches that day. I was proud of myself.
So where does that leave me now? I’ve done 100 approaches, I’ve gotten 9 phone numbers and 1 date. That might not sound like a lot (because it isn’t) but if that’s the price I have to pay to be in control of my dating life then so be it.
I’ve learned the importance of emotional control on this journey. It’s difficult getting into a good mood everyday after work to do daygame not to mention all of the highs and lows you encounter when you are actually daygaming. For my next 100 approaches I hope I date at least 2 girls and make it to the seduction phase of the dating model. You never know what will happen when you are out there daygaming, but whatever happens, I just hope it’s better than these 100 approaches.